The Campaign Trail has some Pot Holes

 Crazy how saying YES to things can really, really change the trajectory of your life. Last spring, an acquitenance called me with news about his friend running for an elected position. A big, high profile position. 
I told him I've never been very involved in politics, but that I would be interested in hearing about his friend and learning more. One conversation lead to another and then to an in person meeting....and a volunteer position on someone's campaign. 

Over the summer I helped out by making calls and introductions. I spent my weekends making marketing materials, writing a lot of articles, blogs and website content. I learned a lot. I learned that making a change takes a lot of phone calls and elbow grease. 

Then- in late September a friend and co-worker of mine said he was really praying about running for office. A seat as a Representative in the NC House. I was proud of him and felt like he could really make a difference. I encouraged him and really believed that NC needed him. I was really excited  about his passion for the office and hoped that he would run.

The next week he came in to my office and said he was filling out some paperwork for the Board of Elections and asked if I could help him fill out the forms and double check after him.  

That weekend he made plans to attend his first public event as a candidate. We didn't have marketing materials or even business cards to pass out- but he was going to be there and make the rounds at an event called "Politics in the Park". 

To this day, I don't know how this all evolved into me being his campaign manager, but I'm bursting with honor and pride at being part of this process and journey. 

In November, I went to the Board of Elections with Brian and his parents to officially file for candidacy. He was "in it to win it" and we hit the pavement hard with spitballing, researching and marketing.

Every spare moment has been crammed with phone calls, social media posts, article writing, spitballing ideas for fundraising and creating campaign graphics. Every weekend spent making those spitball ideas become reality. 

Since announcing the campaign we've had our fair share of hurdles to jump. The state has redrawn district lines. We've gone from District 70 to District 61 and back to District 70./..which is a marketing nightmare. The primary dates changed from March to May with talk of it being extended until June. Brian's son had a serious football injury resulting in several weeks of hospitalization, numerous surgeries and now awaiting a skingraft. In January, I was diagnosed with severe anemia and needed emergency surgery which required a 6 week recovery. WE'VE CLEARED EVERY HURDLE. God has been faithful through all of this! 

The primaries are in just a few weeks. I'm looking forward to what God has in store for Brian and  Randolph County!

This is Why

It's been almost two years since I purchased my home.   The very first time that I stepped onto the property that I now call home I envisioned BBQ's, pool parties and friends milling around. I saw my adult children chasing their little ones, swings hanging from trees and bikes left laying in the yard.  It's what sold the home. The image of  the chance to make memories in the same place----over and over and over. 

In June, I was able to see that vision fulfilled again. Montgomery Jane had her 1st birthday in Gigi's back yard. It was so beautiful. Kiddles worked so hard to bring Montie's party together.  Papa G built a flower cart to be the focal point of the Parisian Flower Market. The whole afternoon was perfect.

                                                                                                                            

I'm so grateful for my home and family. <3

Shine. Always. 

Accepting and Letting Go

Some truth you hold
Some you let go
But in the end, you've got to know

What kind of love
Is a love that won't break down?
What kind of love
Honestly knows no bounds?
Hopes all things, believes all things
Never, never let me go  -
What Kind of Love, Amy Grant
(Bonus CD- More Music from Behind the Eyes)

Some truth you hold........some you let go. Such simple, profound words of wisdom.

I'm learning to hold some truths. Hold truth...but, let the weight of other people's  presumptions and conditions go. Somethings just are what they are; And somethings are the way they are because you haven't held to truth. 

I've been in some fairly intense therapy with a Christian therapist for a couple of months. My goodness, the things we hold on to and wounds that we protect.....the lies we swallow and regurgitate and swallow again. 

Apparently,  I'm somewhat of an emotional hoarder. Walling up my pain behind busyness and outsourced projects that keep me moving....because when I'm quiet, I feel. And when I feel, I think and when I think I can't make sense of the pain I've known....so it becomes a whole cycle of self-imploding. 

I'm learning to hold and let go....to think and feel and release. Don't hide behind the pain and wall up the feelings for later, when it may make sense.....just let it go.

Discoveries on the Homefront

I'm still in the process of discovering suprises with my new home. Some of the discoveries include: a family of raccoons that  live under the neighbor's barn.  I'm less than a few hundred yards from Main Street so I didn't expect to see much wildlife here in town, but boy was I suprised! There have been deer, a larger than average fox who, like the raccoons, seem to supplement thier winter scavenging at the neighbor's cat bowl. 

Last winter daffodil bulbs pushed up through the front yard presenting a beautiful sea of yellow with intermixed splashes of purple crocus.  It felt like a housewarming gift left by a thoughtful seller. It was a lovely suprise and I couldn't wait to see what spring and summer brought. 

One suprise that still makes me laugh happened on the day of closing on the house. My friend, Sherri discovered a third bathroom in my storage barn out by the pool! I never even opened the barn to look in it prior to going under contract! Ha. 

In two weeks it will be one year since the day I closed on this house. One full year. I'm sitting on my back deck now, looking at the pool, listening to the fountatin on the back deck enjoying the sunsetting through the trees. I'm happy to be home. I'm contenat and I'm so very grateful for what God has graciously and mercifully given. 

A Terrifying Revelation

I highly respect the writings, life and philosophy of CS Lewis. When I heard this quote it cut me a little and convicted me a lot.

My experiences with "LOVE" haven't been very good. In fact, several have commented that my life should be a book or Lifetime movie.

I've known pain and rejection on levels that are reprehensible. Is there ever enough time and healing that the "broken" become "unbroken"? Experiences have left me gun-shy on a level that I didn't realize until I heard this quote a few weeks ago.

Don't get me wrong: I can LOVE. I feel things so deeply. I can give, care, share. I can even forgive.....I have a powerful sense of hope and promise. I can feel. I love so very deeply....

What I can't do is lower my shield, relax my guard or even feign a modicum of vulnerability. I have worked so hard to not ever be naive again that I've lost my ability to experience vulnerability....and according to Mr. Lewis....that translates as losing the ability to be loved. I can love....I just can't allow myself to be loved. That is a terrifying revelation.

An Abundance of Love

I have two babies coming this summer.

Kiddles is having her first baby in June. A baby girl who she's giving a very special family name. Last Thursday morning I went to the ultrasound with Sam and Kiddles.

Baby girl weighs 11 ounces.  Life is such a miracle. It's mind-boggling to see the four chambers of her little heart pulsing and know that it's the size of a dime. 

Gabe and Cate are also having a baby this summer. Baby Griffin is due in July. We don't know the sex yet- but what an exciting summer it's going to be! What an abundance of Love and snuggles and excitement we will have!!

Today Ben-Ben turned two. I Facetimed them tonight and he said,
"Hi Gigi! I'm two! I'm two!" He melts my heart. We read Ayelee and Ben's favorite book, "There's a Monster in Your Book!" and Gabe's childhood favorite book, "Eeny, Meeny, Miney, Mo". Each turn of the page is creating a new memory while bringing back so many old memories. Gabe could recite the book by heart when he was three; I'm pretty sure he still can!

My heart is full and I'm so, so grateful for the abundance of love that's been bestowed upon me and my family.

Seventy-Two Degrees

The weather was beautiful today and this evening. Jacob and I built a fire on the back deck and grilled our hotdogs for dinner. 

The sky was clear, the moon had a beautiful ring of light around it. The raccoon from our woods ventured out to our driveway snooping around the neighbors back porch. The moon was bright enough that it reflected in the raccoons eyes, making him easy to track through the darkness.

Today's weather was perfect....but it was the conversation and easy pace of our evening that made it a warm night to be around the firepit. <3 br="" nbsp="">